I will not allow depression to keep me down…

To Be or not to be is the question, that is you are the only one that can answer that. Will you transition or not, is it worth all that you must deal with to become the real you, The you that has been hiding inside all these years wanting to come out. Everyday we fight for our freedom to live our lives as we chose to, it does not matter about what family and friends think about the way we feel or the way we have chosen to live, only we can make the difference. I have lose my family and all my friends because of the decision that I have made, but it was for my health, so that I could live a better life without all the stress because of my heart. It may be hard to believe but I have now more stress to deal with then ever before. Sometimes I truly believe that is what keeps me going. I know that if you say it does not matter what others think or say that it will make you feel better, but in reality it does matter, we all have feelings and words can hurt a lot sometime, especially when they come from someone that you have love most of your life. You wonder if your family will except you or your friends will feel the need to still be your friend. I found that a lot of those people that were my friends turned out to be the kind of people that feel like if they except me, that their friends will turn against them and think that they are gay or something because they are with me. Will if I needed someone to come to my home and take me to the store to buy food I would be out of luck because there is no one here I can count on to help me, it’s a sad thing, but it is true. I stood out in the rain at the bus stop waiting for the bus as three of my own neighbors drove out of the same part, but did not pick me up. I was soak and wet but that is all I could do, then I had to deal with the assholes on the bus. Well, I know that I am trying to make myself feel better and believe that I am right about what I do.
I try hard to believe in God and what I do. I feel that if God is going to judge me and hold me responsible for my sins then he will hold me for the killing that I have done in my life not for being a Transgender. It does not say I shall not be a Trans, it say’s that I shall not kill. So if I go to hell it will not be for being a transwoman…
Yes I am Miss Bobbie Jean and I have a dream” one race called the human race”..
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